14 December 2015

Heartbroken

14.12.15
Baby G - I sit here in the emergency department and hope and pray that you are ok. It is amazing how much love and connection you can feel straight away when you find out you are expecting. You notice the immediate changes in your body and know that life isn't going to be the same again. This time things felt different and i knew straight away you were going to be a girl. I am happy no matter what sex you are as i know you will make me and your dad so very happy.
Please fight little BG, we love you and look forward to seeing you on the screen next week to make sure you are big and strong at six weeks 5 days.

Love Mumma xoxo

15.12.15
So unfortunately Baby G won't be joining us and I cannot believe we are here again. Should we have waited to try again? The specialists and doctors all gave us the green light to try again and now I have to wait to see if nature will take her course or will I need another evacuation procedure. I am so calm it is frightening - when I do feel the sharp pains in my tummy i feel angry more than upset. Why us? Why can't we keep our little bundles that are conceived so easily? Should I have waited?

I am just so hurt, gutted, sad and so very disappointed.

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