After having nearly 8 months off work I went back yesterday to a great role in the city. I did so with mixed feelings - guilt, sadness and excitement.
I felt sooo guilty leaving my little Maddie after spending everyday with her since she was born - technically we haven't been apart for 16 months if you count womb time haha!! Lots of tears the last few days everytime I look at her and give her bottles to her. So happy that hubby/Dad is on paternity leave and they are having a great time together.... going to take some time to get used to leaving the house all day. 5am bottles and 530pm shower and bottles are the goal for me everyday.
Sad that I don't get to see her for all the hours in the day that I used too..... no singing play school everyday or having random moments and cuddles - that face!!! Love that face, her eyes just look at you and it is the best feeling in the world - she makes my heart beat so loud and proud to be her mum.
Excitement to be able to return to work and learn a new role in a new company with great culture and people. Wearing makeup and big girl clothes instead of trackies!! Catching the train and listening to music or reading having some me time feels good. Lunching with friends in the city and enjoying hot coffee and sitting down to eat breakfasts and lunches.
Still early days and have a long way to go on this transition from sahm to working mum. I know I will find a good balance and spend quality time with Maddie when I can.